Cash machine Hog

You hogged the cash machine for a full 5 minutes. I was getting soaked in the rain. I only wanted 20 pounds but you were obviously passionate about learning everything there is to possibly know about yours. Like how many more sports-trousers or trainers like the ones you’re wearing could you buy with the money that the machine is telling you that you have?

Cash machine hogger: please hurry up.
(HSBC bank ATM on Kingsbury Road, London NW9)

I hate cash. It’s an annoying and highly inconvenient concept. Especially given that it’s about trading bits and bytes for bits of paper. But especially when it’s raining and the High Street parking warden is on duty.

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